Open Space...

On life... We only see the opposites in the ironies of life, we seldom acknowledge the "in-betweens" which is the sanctuary of maturity that which eventually bears the fruit of wisdom... _______________________ On loosing faith on oneself... Lately I become cynical over things I'm painfully sarcastic about, ostentatious on circumstances complementing on what i perceive to be imperative. Like a leaf wavering in the air after it fell from a tree, the wind perceptively becoming my captain bringing me to ambiguity, transparently loosing my ground. _______________________ On uncertainties The oblivion lingers my head. Trudging a voyager to wander about in the abyss of wisdom. Wondering how this incurable insanity appearing in a lucid dream becomes an existence which is apparently an illusion. _______________________ On helplessness... Murmuring inside is an emphaty to heed the call of the mute, each word subdues his own propinquity, inexplicably desiring to pierce the adversar...

photo credit Hay naku, nakalimutan ko nang magblog. Last post ko dito noong May pa. Wala lang akong ganang magsulat. Mahirap kasi situasyon ko ngayon, maraming iniisip. May mga bagay na gustong mong gawin pero hindi mo magawa-gawa kasi may mga bagay pa na mas importante dito. Minsan nagtatanong narin ako kung importante ba talaga ang mga bagay na pinagtutuunan ko ng pansin. Pero napagtanto ko naman na importante ito - ang isipin muna ang iba bago ang sarili. Konting tiis lang siguro. Napaka unfair naman ng Dios kung mananatali nalang ako sa ganitong sitwasyon panghabang-buhay e halos buong buhay namin eh nasa katayuang sapat na o minsan ay salat talaga. Minsan nagtatampo narin ako sa Kanya. Kahit wala akong karapatang magtampo pero ginagawa ko narin. Wala syang magagawa kasi eto ang feelings ko sa Kanya. At alam ko na naiintindihan Nya ako - sana nga. Hanggang dito nalang at ako'y walang ganang magsulat.

“Santo Subito!” (Saint Now!)This was the loud cry of the people at the funeral of the late Pope John Paul II last April 8, 2005 6 days after his death on April 2. Six years later, Pope John Paul II is beatified - the third of the four steps to sainthood. The First step is the initial investigation of the person's life after he/she is considered for sainthood. It will be in the Diocesan level. After being confirmed, the Vatican will acknowledge a "Nihil Obstat." A Latin for "nothing hinders." In this stage, the person is called "the Servant of God." The second step is the establishing of the heroic act of the person. This will be led by a Postulator who coordinates the causes for beatification or canonization through the judicial processes which includes conducting thorough investigations into the life of the candidate, his works (writings) and deeds. It will be presented to the Congregation for the Causes of Saints in Rome. In this stage, the person is...

Hahay, kuyaw gyud ning kinabuhi, usahay dili ka kasabot. Lisod tugkaron. Daghang mga pangutana. Daghan kaayong mga panghitabo nga makapalibog. Bisag ako nakapangutana na sa akong kaugalingon. Daghan kaayo ko ug pangandoy sa akong kaugalingon ug sa akong pamilya. Pero mura man dili mi magkasinabot sa akong pangandoy. Sa tinuod lang, usahay makapangutana ko sa Ginoo kung ngano ingon ini man ang akong/among kapalaran. Kitang tanan gusto nga mahimong maayo ang kahimtang sa kinabuhi. Gusto nato nga himsog atong panglawas, walay sakit, naay maayong panimalay, maayo ang pamilya, walay gubot, nakapahuman ug eskwela ang mga anak, malinawon ug haruhay nga pagpuyo. Basta ang basic needs makab-ot lang, pwede na. So far makaingon ko nga maayo man among pamilya, although dili mi open sa among mga gibati sa usa't-usa pero makasulti ko nga ang gugma nagpatigbabaw gyud. Bisag pobre ra mi pero maayo man among relasyon sa usag-usa ug sa ubang tao. Pero lagi, aduna pud baya miy mga butang nga gikinah...

kapag nananatiling bulag ang puso sa kalayaan na nais nitong matamasa, at pilit mo itong nililinlang sa mga kasinungalingan ng pagka-imbot, pagbabalatkayo at pagkagahaman, hinding-hindi mo makakamit ang ninanais mong kaligayahan...magparaya ka...maging bukas ka...

A friend of mine who just graduated from a theological school here in Manila sent a message on my mobile phone asking me to pray for him for his final decision to embrace a religious life perpetually. "Bro pls pray 4 me. yes or no ba me sa buhay relihiyoso." What can i say? I believe religious life is a gift. It is something that is given to you by God just like any other vocations - single blessedness and married life. None of these vocations supersede the other, these are equal calling from God. And this guy is responding to the call of becoming a priest. Was the text expressing his confusion? Can he make that decision? Or maybe he just want my prayer. I would be happy if he's confused. It only shows how serious he is in whatever life ahead of him. This will make him think over and over to a lifetime decision he has to make. We need priests right now, and not just priests, but good priests. And i just hope he will be able to go over and reflect his vocation story. It i...

Am I running out of passion on music? I guess not and hopefully not. But every time i pick up "eng2x" (my violin) and think of practicing the piece composed by Pachelbel that I promised to master this year, my hands are suddenly tied up and loosing its grip on the fingerboard. I've always wanted to be a good instrumentalist to my favorite stringed instrument but I failed. It's been three years since i bought it and until now i can't even finished book II of the Suzuki method, too bad. Poor "Mr. Time," he always falls prey to my conventional scape goat which is "i don't have time to practice." Ever since I was a child, the typical sound of this instrument have always been like a lullaby for me. I like its music because it feels like the notes are physically coming out from within every time you play it. It's dredging up those emotions that have been long hidden from uncertainties and letting it soar as if everything else is freedom. The ...

I was on my way going home from my work that usually ends at 11:30 PM. I arrived at the tricycle terminal station and then i took the next tricycle bound for Bagong Silangan, the place where I live. I really don't like to be seated at the extension seat inside the sidecar of the tricycle for the place is to narrow. But i have no option since the seat at the back of the driver was already occupied. For me it was just a normal night, I do this routine every night except during my day off. I was tired that time and almost fell asleep when suddenly the tricycle stopped. I don't know what exactly happened in front of us since i was inside and facing the entrance of the sidecar. Then suddenly i heard gun shots. At first i thought it was just a firecracker, but who could have done that this month? Suddenly i got outside the tricycle to see what happened. And what i saw was several young men running away and a man holding a gun going to the place where i was standing trying to hide(la...

They say that those people who are tough, strong, sturdy, are people who are actually weak, vulnerable - only looking for affection and love... they hush up or conceal themselves to a pseudo-narcissism. Why can't they just be true to themselves to save the hassle of deceiving their ego? A pity! - just a thought though... -melskiens-

"Spiritually speaking, what do you do when questions no longer inspire you?" I quote this one from one of the contributors of Yahoo Answer named "Just Be." It's just a simple question - not inspiring, though, thought-provoking. Somehow if one will think of it, you will really ponder what if, indeed, questions will no longer inspire you? /Ms./Mrs./Mr. Just Be is only asking this in the context of how he indulges himself/herself in answering or posting questions on Yahoo Answers . However, on my part, this question also hovers to my own individual deeds as i try to venture on my own life's exploration. I usually go to this web site just to scan questions of no-where-to-be-found, none sense, not-so-nonsense, and sensible ones. Maybe because I'm a type of person who has a lot of questions to offer "to my own consumption," that's why this question poses chastisement on my kinda bewildered (in the sense of leaving the formation i had) but exh...

I'm all alone right now at the office. My office mate wasn't around. I heard from her yesterday that she needs to be with her family for some urgent reason. I don't know if she got a permission to take a day of absent or just took it her way. I was scheduled to have a day shift (Manila time)for the 24/7 operation of our eBay account. The usual operations with some other departments will start at around 9PM Manila time which is 5AM US Pacific time. While writing this, it is already 4AM eastern time or 1AM Pacific time. No calls coming in since I clocked in and I'm just here sitting at my station browsing some online news reading some current events. By the way, I was 10 minutes late because i went to Tandang Sora with my friend, who is a priest, before heading to work. I was rushing to be on time but i failed. I guess I have to settle that concern later on and bear the consequences. Every minute and even seconds in this kind of job counts, that's the thing. Anyways, ...

Hay naku! Naguguluhan ako kung ano ang isusulat ko. Andyan yung pagcecelebrate sa Chinese New Year, Kurapsyon sa AFP, Rebolusyon sa Egypt, Valentines day, Love story nila Piolo at ang crush na crush kung si KC Concepcion. Ewan ko ba!. Sya nga pala, hindi ako nakakain ng Tikoy (Nián gāo) sa Chinese New year na ito . Sabi pa naman nila na swe-swertehin ka kapag kumain ka ng tikoy, eh paano ngayon yan, hindi ako nakakain ng tikoy, ibig bang sabihin hindi ako magiging swerte sa taong ito? Gustuhin ko mang isanguni sa aking sodiac sign pero mas lalong magulo - ang dating pinakamamahal kong Capricorn ay napalitan na ng Sagitarrius, tsk,tsk. Pumasok-pasok pa kasi sa eksena ang Ophiuchus. Kung sabagay kasali naman talaga sya. At ngayon, naguguluhan narin ang mga taong nagbibigay kahulugan sa mga sodiac signs, goodluck sa kanila. Pero ito lang ang masasabi ko, hindi man ako Capricorn pero gusto ko parin and papaitan, kalderetang kambing, at kilawin - hmmmm sarap!..tulo laway! Nakakatulo laway d...

Magandang Araw, Magandang Buwan, Magandang Bituin, Magandang Ulap, at Magandang Langit! (kasi parati nalang si Araw ang bida, at least mapagbigyan din natin ng pagkakataon ang ibang bagay na nakikita sa langit at pati ang langit mismo, toinks!) A beautiful day to everyone! it's been a long while since i haven't posted here on my blog. The reason being is that i ran out of things to right - and to simply explain that- Katamaran! hehe.. With my new schedule sa work- hopefully i can go back to my blogging activity. i missed so many things worth writing on my blog. And so i missed so many opportunities expressing my being in the web world. i don't want to share with somebody the things that are happening to me. i better express it in a different way. for one, i have with "eng2x" accompanying me though i haven't spent so much time eng2x lately. i sometimes left myself alone, wandering things inside my head - reflecting, thinking, daydreaming? nah - whatsoever! the ...