Random Musings

On life...

We only see the opposites in the ironies of life, we seldom acknowledge the "in-betweens" which is the sanctuary of maturity that which eventually bears the fruit of wisdom...

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On loosing faith on oneself...

Lately I become cynical over things I'm painfully sarcastic about, ostentatious on circumstances complementing on what i perceive to be imperative. Like a leaf wavering in the air after it fell from a tree, the wind perceptively becoming my captain bringing me to ambiguity, transparently loosing my ground.

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On uncertainties

The oblivion lingers my head. Trudging a voyager to wander about in the abyss of wisdom. Wondering how this incurable insanity appearing in a lucid dream becomes an existence which is apparently an illusion.

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On helplessness...

Murmuring inside is an emphaty to heed the call of the mute, each word subdues his own propinquity, inexplicably desiring to pierce the adversary not known to his prudence.


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On Solitude...

Venturing into the waves that roll between loneliness and solitude. Sometimes thinking of drowning my own sublime truth.

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On fear of Love...

Where to find this Love in whose yearning tends to diminish? Or perhaps fear is just lingering to the mere absence of fortitude? This might just be playing in my mind. So then please take my wisdom and buried it to the deepest chamber of love's sanctuary, never known to man unless exhausted by ecstasy.

_______________________

On finding Love...

In solitude on that which my soul is in salutary, i constantly finding my peace which are invisible and intangible. However, it remains as it is until such love surpasses my being. For love alone can unite and fulfill two individuals at the very core - Where are you then my love?

_______________________


On loneliness...

It's hard when i see it's raining, dark as the world of man. Yet into each life some rain must fall. I have played in rain before, in which i played with my tears as well, hiding it together with the raindrops.

Wala sa Mood!

photo credit


Hay naku, nakalimutan ko nang magblog. Last post ko dito noong May pa. Wala lang akong ganang magsulat. Mahirap kasi situasyon ko ngayon, maraming iniisip. May mga bagay na gustong mong gawin pero hindi mo magawa-gawa kasi may mga bagay pa na mas importante dito. Minsan nagtatanong narin ako kung importante ba talaga ang mga bagay na pinagtutuunan ko ng pansin. Pero napagtanto ko naman na importante ito - ang isipin muna ang iba bago ang sarili. Konting tiis lang siguro. Napaka unfair naman ng Dios kung mananatali nalang ako sa ganitong sitwasyon panghabang-buhay e halos buong buhay namin eh nasa katayuang sapat na o minsan ay salat talaga.
Minsan nagtatampo narin ako sa Kanya. Kahit wala akong karapatang magtampo pero ginagawa ko narin. Wala syang magagawa kasi eto ang feelings ko sa Kanya. At alam ko na naiintindihan Nya ako - sana nga.
Hanggang dito nalang at ako'y walang ganang magsulat.

Blessed Pope John Paul II

“Santo Subito!” (Saint Now!)This was the loud cry of the people at the funeral of the late Pope John Paul II last April 8, 2005 6 days after his death on April 2. Six years later, Pope John Paul II is beatified - the third of the four steps to sainthood.

The First step is the initial investigation of the person's life after he/she is considered for sainthood. It will be in the Diocesan level. After being confirmed, the Vatican will acknowledge a "Nihil Obstat." A Latin for "nothing hinders." In this stage, the person is called "the Servant of God." The second step is the establishing of the heroic act of the person. This will be led by a Postulator who coordinates the causes for beatification or canonization through the judicial processes which includes conducting thorough investigations into the life of the candidate, his works (writings) and deeds. It will be presented to the Congregation for the Causes of Saints in Rome. In this stage, the person is called "Venerable." The third is the Beatification. One requirement here is the miracle through the person's intercession. On JP II's case, it was a French nun named Sister Marie Simon-Pierre who was "miraculously" cured of the incurable Parkinson's disease. This was officially declared by the Vatican to have an "intercession" of Pope John Paul II. This time the person will be addressed as "Blessed." The last stage is the Canonization. This stage requires another miracle after the beatification. After thorough investigation, the Pope will declare the person as "Saint."

I'm one of the millions of people around the world celebrating with this great event! Hope this will draw inspirations to many.

Hahay, Ang kinabuhi sa tao - Istoryaheee!

Hahay, kuyaw gyud ning kinabuhi, usahay dili ka kasabot. Lisod tugkaron. Daghang mga pangutana. Daghan kaayong mga panghitabo nga makapalibog. Bisag ako nakapangutana na sa akong kaugalingon. Daghan kaayo ko ug pangandoy sa akong kaugalingon ug sa akong pamilya. Pero mura man dili mi magkasinabot sa akong pangandoy. Sa tinuod lang, usahay makapangutana ko sa Ginoo kung ngano ingon ini man ang akong/among kapalaran. Kitang tanan gusto nga mahimong maayo ang kahimtang sa kinabuhi. Gusto nato nga himsog atong panglawas, walay sakit, naay maayong panimalay, maayo ang pamilya, walay gubot, nakapahuman ug eskwela ang mga anak, malinawon ug haruhay nga pagpuyo. Basta ang basic needs makab-ot lang, pwede na. So far makaingon ko nga maayo man among pamilya, although dili mi open sa among mga gibati sa usa't-usa pero makasulti ko nga ang gugma nagpatigbabaw gyud. Bisag pobre ra mi pero maayo man among relasyon sa usag-usa ug sa ubang tao. Pero lagi, aduna pud baya miy mga butang nga gikinahanglan. Lisod-lisoron pud lagi ta usahay usa pa makab-ot bisan ang mga basic nga panginahanglan sa tao. Pero proud baya ko nga bisan sa among kapobrehon, daghan baya mi natabangan sa among mga paryente ug sa ubang tao. Pero mas makatabang pa unta mi ug dako-dako kung abunda pud mi.

Bitaw, wala mo kabantay? Katong mga ngil-ad ug mga kinaiya or batasan, katong mga kurap, hakog, killer, mangtas, mga dili mutoo sa Ginoo, katong mga demonyo sa atong panahon mao pa hinuon ang nakatagamtam ug kaharuhay sa kinabuhi. Ingon sa Bibliya, "Blessed is the Poor (in spirit or materially)because theirs is the Kingdom of God." Pero unsaon man nimo ang Kingdom of God kung gutom ang tao? Unya moingon kita nga "sige lang, ana jud ng pobre, antus lang usa kay sure naman ka sa langit inig kamatay nimo." Toinks! Estoryaheeee!!! Dili ba pwede paboran pud ta sa Ginoo? Usahay, walay mahimo ang tao kung dili mag romanticize nalang, we appeal to our emotions. Dili ko muingon nga maayo na jud kong tao pero kung ikompara nato sa uban - sus! ambot lang. Usahay i-justify nalang nato ang mga butang nga nahitabo. Ihapon nalang daw nato ang mga blessings nga gihatag sa atoa without the monetary value like - kinabuhi, ginhawa, maayong panglawas, pangsinabtanay, walay kaaway, malinawong pagpuyo, mga higala, ang kinaiyahan ang simpleng katawa ug uban pa (by the way, mutuo ko ani) Well, acknowledged, even those who are not entitled aning mga butanga natagamtaman man pud ni nila - so what's the difference? To answer this, dili usa nato iapil ang out of this world notions, diri usa ta sa unsay nahitabo sa adlaw-adlaw - ang karon. The difference is --- sila busog, ug ang mga buotan - GUTOM. Hahay ang kinabuhi gyud. Pero sa laing bahin, Maayo nalang pud nga ingon ani ang nahitabo kay siguro lisod pud ang kahimtang nila kung buot hunahunaon. Ikaw, gusto nimo mahimong killer? Di ba dili? Libuga nako noh? hehe..Pero usahay makahuna-huna baya ko nga magbinugoy, basin pa diay,hehe. Bitaw, ang ako lang hangyo sa Ginoo ba, (kung makabasa man gani ka ani akong blog) nga unta, ayaw lang palabii ang pag-antus sa uban. Dili ba pwede nga abunda ka unya maayo pa jud kang tao? Unsa na sila nga category? - the middle force? Mga pinili? Mao ba ni sila ang makaadto sa purgatoryo? good for them.

Ingon nila, ang pobre kuno kay nahimong pobre kay mga tapulan man sila. Pero kung muadto ka sa mga bukid, ang mga farmers nato, mumata na sila ug alas 4 sa kaadlawon para magandam sa ilahang umahan, mapabulad sa adlaw sa udtong tutok, unya magtugway sa kabaw, mouli na sa ilaha gabii na sa alas otso -- karon, tapulan ba na sila? bahala namo mangutana kung nganong igon ani man ang nahitabo. Ug usahay sudlan dayon ni siya sa rebolusyonaryong panghuna-huna, tungod ang gobyerno nato kay dili makatarunagnon, adunay inhustisya, mao mga ang pobre musamot kapobre ug ang mga datu musamot kadatu, ug dapat atong isalikway ang Gobyerno ug atong ibarog ang tinuod nga Gobyerno sa mga Tao. Well, tinuod ni sya pero usahay we become so idealistic pud nga usahay mahimong idea nalang pud ang tanan --- Waaaaahhhh ambot! galibog nako. Pero usa lang akong masulti. Bisan pa man sa mga panghitabo nga dili maayo, padayon gihapon ta sa atong kinabuhi. Paglaum. No choice pero maglaum nalang jud ta, wala tay mahimo, free man ni sya. Kung duna gihapon kay paglaum, mutuo gihapon ka nga mahimong paborable ang tanan sa imoha, diri sa kalibutan ug sa laing kalibutan... Dili ka mutuo? Hala, Pagminatay diha ug hilak sa kilid, tan-awon nato kung naa bay mahitabo sa imoha, hehehe... Bitaw, naa man Siya kanunay namati sa atoa, muduol lang gyud ta sa Iyaha.

wala lang...

kapag nananatiling bulag ang puso sa kalayaan na nais nitong matamasa, at pilit mo itong nililinlang sa mga kasinungalingan ng pagka-imbot, pagbabalatkayo at pagkagahaman, hinding-hindi mo makakamit ang ninanais mong kaligayahan...magparaya ka...maging bukas ka...

Confused religious brother?

A friend of mine who just graduated from a theological school here in Manila sent a message on my mobile phone asking me to pray for him for his final decision to embrace a religious life perpetually.

"Bro pls pray 4 me. yes or no ba me sa buhay relihiyoso."

What can i say? I believe religious life is a gift. It is something that is given to you by God just like any other vocations - single blessedness and married life. None of these vocations supersede the other, these are equal calling from God. And this guy is responding to the call of becoming a priest. Was the text expressing his confusion? Can he make that decision? Or maybe he just want my prayer.

I would be happy if he's confused. It only shows how serious he is in whatever life ahead of him. This will make him think over and over to a lifetime decision he has to make. We need priests right now, and not just priests, but good priests. And i just hope he will be able to go over and reflect his vocation story. It is God who initiated the calling, and it's up to us to respond to that calling. I just hope he will go back to the very first encounter where in he felt he was first called by God. Hopefully i can find time to talk with him the matter. For the meantime, all i can offer right now is also a text message replied to him:

" Try to reflect what makes you think otherwise and identify those things. Kaya ba nimo i-let go? Can you also picture out yourself 30 years from now? Would you be happy by that time then to whatever decision you will make today? "


-melskiens-

4 Seasons of Loneliness - captivates my heart ever since.

When can I hear the music again?

Am I running out of passion on music? I guess not and hopefully not. But every time i pick up "eng2x" (my violin) and think of practicing the piece composed by Pachelbel that I promised to master this year, my hands are suddenly tied up and loosing its grip on the fingerboard. I've always wanted to be a good instrumentalist to my favorite stringed instrument but I failed. It's been three years since i bought it and until now i can't even finished book II of the Suzuki method, too bad. Poor "Mr. Time," he always falls prey to my conventional scape goat which is "i don't have time to practice."

Ever since I was a child, the typical sound of this instrument have always been like a lullaby for me. I like its music because it feels like the notes are physically coming out from within every time you play it. It's dredging up those emotions that have been long hidden from uncertainties and letting it soar as if everything else is freedom. The real me is engaging, communicating, giving, speaking and loving. Not that I am living a bogus life all these years although I have reservations on my own, consuming my appetite for individuality. Not that I'm boring or a paranoid of some kind because I"m not. I can be jolly, funny and a clown. You can even have me sing (R&B, Boys II Men)type of songs, and dance. I can be nice, wild and serious as well. Did I mentioned being holy?. Yeah, I can be, maybe, perhaps, i guess so.

People are coming to me to tell their stories, may it be the happy and the not-so-happy one. I don't know why but what I only noticed is that I listen. A very good trait for a musician. You have to be a good listener to have a good grasp on music. However, I find it hard to do otherwise in terms of telling stories. It is refreshing that you were able to put smile on faces of other people that are drench in tears. However, there is also this emptiness while seeing yourself deprived of that same happiness you gave to them. I not the type of person who tell stories, especial my own story to others - personally. I can write it, though sometimes I'm lazy and I'm not good at writing I should say. It's better to keep it myself. I am more attuned to it and more comfortable and in time like this, music fills in. I always consider Music as the best alternative way in expressing myself. I've done sketching and went to painting. But the ink only runs in my veins once in a while and i can't just fit my image on a canvass. But lately I felt the need to revitalize my inclination to music. I guess this is the right time to be in touch again with eng2x. I have a good grip this time, maybe?. Inspirations are there waiting to be discovered. Or perhaps all i need is an open heart. Now, it's not anymore all about mastering a piece or becoming a very good instrumentalist, technically speaking. What is important rather, is the language and its message that is conveying to you as the one who plays and that you are able to perceptibly transcend that connectivity between your being and the music beyond your limited horizon. There certainly, i can beautifully hear the music.

Japan 8.9 earthquake and Tsunami Photos

I THANK GOD FOR MY SECOND LIFE!

I was on my way going home from my work that usually ends at 11:30 PM. I arrived at the tricycle terminal station and then i took the next tricycle bound for Bagong Silangan, the place where I live. I really don't like to be seated at the extension seat inside the sidecar of the tricycle for the place is to narrow. But i have no option since the seat at the back of the driver was already occupied. For me it was just a normal night, I do this routine every night except during my day off. I was tired that time and almost fell asleep when suddenly the tricycle stopped. I don't know what exactly happened in front of us since i was inside and facing the entrance of the sidecar. Then suddenly i heard gun shots. At first i thought it was just a firecracker, but who could have done that this month? Suddenly i got outside the tricycle to see what happened. And what i saw was several young men running away and a man holding a gun going to the place where i was standing trying to hide(later i found out that he was a policeman). He was also one of the passengers behind the tricycle driver. It was then i realized that i was in the middle of the gun fire and that those running were the young men who are trying to rob us. I was so afraid especially when i saw "sumpak," an improvised gun and a wounded man lying in the street (who eventually died later on). I also saw a car behind us trying to get away from the scene. What i did was to ran away, afraid that those young men might get back to us. I started to touch my body to check if i got wounded and thank God I was safe but not the one passenger. I heard the tricycle driver saying that the dead man was the passenger seated behind him. I just walk away from the place where the robbery took place, trying to calm myself and also reflecting that It could have been me who's lying dead on the street. I felt sorry for the dead passenger but thankful that I'm alive. I rode a tricycle going to my place and there were already policemen and media from TV 5 covering the incident. I arrived home safe this time. Fresh from my mind about what happened - i reflected about life. I prayed and thank God for the second life He gave me.




Medal eyed for cop who foiled robbery
By JEFFREY DAMICOG
March 6, 2011, 3:22pm

(Report from Manila Bulletin)



MANILA, Philippines - A 16-year-old robber and a passenger were killed while an off-duty policeman was wounded during a foiled hold-up conducted by a group of youths on the passengers of a tricycle in Quezon City before dawn yesterday.

Meanwhile, Chief Inspector Ariel Capocao, deputy chief of the Quezon City Police District’s Criminal Inves-tigation and Detection Unit (QCPD-CIDU), said that recommendations have been made to give PO1 Santos Osorio a medal for his actions.

Capocao said that Osorio, who is assigned to the Regional Mobile Group of the National Capital Re¬gion Police Office (NCRPO-RMG), managed to kill one of the robbers despite being shot and hurt.

The police official identified the young dead robber as Rey Joseph Bartolome, 16, a resident of No. 8 Sampaguita St., Dama de Noche, Barangay Payatas, Quezon City.

Capocao said that Bartolome was the only one armed with an improvised shotgun among seven other male youths during an attempted holdup of a tricycle at around 1 a.m. yesterday along Sampaguita St., Dama de Noche, Barangay Payatas.

Bartolome shot Osorio as well as killed a passenger identified as Agosto Violata, a resident of Barangay Bagong Silangan, Quezon City. Violata died on the spot.

Capocao said that Osorio was already off-duty in civilian clothes and was on his way home at No. 98 Springfield St., in Payatas A, Quezon City.

Osorio and Violata were both riding behind the tricycle driver while three other passengers were aboard the sidecar when the robbery took place.

Capocao said that a group of youths blocked the path of the tricycle and declared a holdup.

For no reason, Bartolome suddenly fired a shot at the direction of Osorio and Violata. Violata sustained multiple gunshot wounds while the policeman sustained gunshot wounds in left leg and left side of his torso.



2 patay, 1 sugatan sa Payatas hold-up
(News from REMATE)


PATAY ang dalawa katao, habang isa ang sugatan sa panghoholdap sa isang tricycle sa Payatas Quezon City.

Sinabi ni Senior Police Officer (SPO) 1 Remo Duro ng Quezon City Police Station Six na bandang 1:00 ng madaling-araw nang harangin ng pitong kabataang lalaki na armado ng sumpak ang tricycle na may mga pasahero, papunta ng Barangay Bagong Silangan.

Nang malaman umano ng mga suspek na pulis ang isa sa mga pasahero ng tricycle ay agad nagpaputok ang mga ito na ikinamatay ng pasaherong si Agusto Vilota.

Gumanti naman ng putok ang pulis na si Police Officer 1 Osorio Santos ng National Capital Region Police Office (NCRPO) Regional Mobile Group at napatay ang isa sa mga suspek na si Rey Joseph Bartolome.

Nagtamo naman ng tama ng bala sa binti si Santos ngunit ligtas ang ibang pasahero ng tricycle at driver nito. Remate Online






2 killed, cop hurt in QC robbery try
Report from Dennis Datu, dzMM TeleRadyo: ABS-CBN NEWS


QUEZON CITY, Philippines – Two people were killed while a police officer was wounded when armed men tried to rob tricycle passengers in Quezon City early Sunday morning, police said.

Seven men armed with homemade guns blocked a tricycle carrying several passengers around 1 a.m. in Payatas, according to Senior Police Officer 1 Remo Duro.

One of the passengers, however, was a police officer.

The robbers apparently panicked and fired their guns, killing passenger Agusto Vilota.

PO1 Osorio Santos, who was one of the passengers, immediately returned fire and killed one of the suspects, identified as Rey Joseph Bartolome.

Santos himself was hit in the leg by gunfire while the other passengers and the driver were unharmed.

The robbers, who have yet to be identified, escaped, according to police investigators.


-melskiens-